Hindsight, my nemesis

Sometimes I get back to thinking about who I was in college. College was a very weird experience, for a number of reasons. I actually wrote a really long, detailed, wordy post, but decided that it could be summed up like this:

I made the best decisions of my life.

I made the worst decisions of my life.

(That is some Dickensian nonsense right there)

College is often called your formative years, where you stop becoming an extension of your parents and blossom into a fully autonomous adult. I learned how to live on my own. I experienced independence, I nailed down a work ethic (after failing miserably due to my old lack of a work ethic), I started eating healthy (aside from the occasional trip to Olive Garden to abuse their infinite breadstick policy), and I gained a lot of other life skills that I'll take with me forever. I also met a lot of really cool people that I still consider good friends. Thanks, college.

I also met some terrible people, and was a terrible person myself, at times. I still shudder when I think of some of the things I said out loud, some of the things I thought made me look good in front of others, and even some of the things I said and did in class. I think only one word can describe how I feel about the negative side of college: my bad. Wait, that's two words. Well, it's one phrase. Whatever. Either way, the point is, I still think back on this sometimes and visibly cringe, mentally trying to shove these memories back to the vault of oblivion that I originally put them in. But they keep escaping, especially when Person A I did some stupid shit around is friends with Person B I'm still cool with on Facebook and posts on the same status as me or I run into Person A in public. Awkward. I'm not the same guy, I swear. (Metaphorically)

I'm glad I have a positive and negative side of things to look back on, in order to be a better human being going forward. I know who I want to be and I definitely know who I don't want to be.

This post might seem very personal, but it is, actually, universally applicable to anyone who goes to college or spends their early young adult years in a particular community. You have both the good and the bad to push you forward, and sometimes you can't tell which is which until you're a few years ahead and look back at your experience. Both sides can help you grow in a positive way.

Tomorrow is another day, etc.